A night to remember

Childhood. Such a simple word, but it really means so much more than just being of a young age. To me, childhood is synonymous with innocence for many logical reasons, but is defined as such in my mind due to one overwhelming experience i had as a wee lad.

It was a summer just like any other, carefree to the point where i honestly considered legally changing my name to Tom Sawyer. I was doing whatever I wanted wherever and whenever I wanted. Our daily ritual that summer happened to be a game we called "night tag," which is pretty self-explanatory, but basically served to burn the boundless energy we had in the form of running in circles. I vividly remember one night that was especially muggy and humid. Running was really starting to tire me out, so i retreated to a fat little bush that was my secret hiding spot. This particular bush had a nice little section of it that didn't have any leaves, so it served as a little room for me to lie down and catch my breath. Laying on my back I could vaguely make out the beautiful starry night above me as the hot breeze rolling over my bare chest was starting to make me feel like i had been trapped in the desert with no water for days. I suddenly remembered a very important fact about man's best friend: when dogs are hot, their fur naturally sheds. This is the human equivalent to taking clothes off, and I thought that it was rather unfair that dogs could do this and I couldn't. Without a second thought, i got naked as fast as i could. Ah, that felt better, now I can play some serious night tag! I ran out to show my peers my birthday suit and was genuinely surprised when i was greeted with screams resembling that of someone being chased by a serial killer with a chainsaw. I wasn't even "it" but these people were running away from me as fast as they possibly could and were not looking back. I was quickly ushered by one of the mothers nearby into the house we were playing at, where i was made to wait in shame for my father to come and pick me up.

At a ripe nine years old, I didn't know what sex was. In fact, i still thought girls had cooties. Nevertheless, i learned a very important lesson that day: dogs have much better lives than humans.